Travelog Ramadhan-Journey towards Mardhatillah #1

Assalamualaikum wbt (: 

Ramadhan datang lagi ! alhamdulillah, tk tau knape bt I have this one feeling that this Ramadhan is going to be different :D rasa excited sgt menunggu hari baru. alhamdulillah, dah 2 Ramadhan now. harap2 boleh maintain momentum fr the consecutive 29 days ! ameen ! :) 

So ape tu travelog Ramadhan ? hehe :) rancangannya, nk coretkan apa yg saya lalui dalam journey Ramadhan kali ni. why do I call it a journey ? sbb dlm Ramadhan ni la kte akan diuji dari berbagai-bagai segi, and I think the best way fr me to share is here, as a reminder fr me in the future, and a lesson to those who happen to read this ;) 

My first day had been a great one :) I managed to figure out a few things that Allah might be testing on me. antaranya ialah SABAR dan KAWAL NAFSU (: so, sabar apa yg Allah uji saya ? sabar dlm mnghadapi masalah, especially in handling people. biasanya, kalau masalah tu hanya kita dan kita, senang je nk selesaikan right ? tp bila melibatkan org lain, memang kita kena sabar. susah, sgt susah. tp saya rasa hikmahnya puasa ni, saya tk larat nk rasa marah ! hehe. kelakar kan ? tp saya rasa best sgt :) bila penat, kita malas nk marah2 or tension2. so instead, anything that pissed me off yesterday, I just deal with it with a smile, alhamdulillah ! 

Kawal nafsu. bagi saya, yang ni pulak nafsu untuk berbelanja kot :) biasa la kn, bulan Ramadhan ni, dengan bazaar la, kuih muih laa. memang banyak godaan. lebih2 lagi kt MMU ni, bazaar kt depan surau =.= punya la byk godaan nk melangkah ke surau tu. hehe. nasib baik lah saya tinggalkan purse kt bilik. so nk beli kuih pun tk boleh. alhamdulillah, da elak pembaziran ^_^

Selepas muhasabah diri kita, mungkin kita akan sedar apa yang Allah uji kita hari tu. If ujian tu kita tk handle dgn baik, expect it to come again, sbb Dia akan uji dan uji smpai la kita pass :) mungkin itulah pentingnya muhasabah. so that tkde la sia2 Allah uji kita :)

wallahua'lam. 

Boyfriend ? hmm.

Assalamualaikum :) 

Ha ! sape  penah ade boyfriend ? hehe. best kan bercinta ni. semuanya indah. sms sepanjang masa, gayut2, dating. wahhh ! memang best laa ! :D

Tapi kan, perlu ke semua tu ? ada kawan saya ni cakap, "Best nya, tgk org laen ade boyfriend". C'mon la dear. you don't need a guy to define your life, to tell people that you're happy, to tell people you're pretty. urgh. sy tk tau mcm mn sy nk explain, tp the point is, semua tu tak perlu ! 

Tipu la kalau cakap sy tk pernah couple. pernah je, and lama pulak tuu. bila break rs mcm nk mati. tp lama2 rs mcm bodoh pulak sedih2. kenapa kena sedih kalau ada Allah ? ALLAH ITU SEHEBAT-HEBAT PENCINTA ! pernah ke jumpa kekasih yang ada di sisi kita 24 jam ? pernah ke jumpa kekasih yang tak pernah kisah kita nak merungut, menangis, mengadu kt dia pasal semua benda ? kalau pernah jumpa, tolong bgtau sy eh ;) hehe. tp adat kita manusia, tkkan cintalah kita kalau tk bertemu, bersua. subhanallah, itulah cantiknya bercinta dengan Allah ! kita kumpul rindu sebanyak-banyak nya, bayangkan one day bila kita jumpa Dia. Indahnya !! :') 

Macam mn nk bercinta dengan Allah kalau kita tk kenal Dia kn ? sebab tu Dia dah bagi surat2 cinta kt kita, al-Quran. baca, hayati surat2 cinta tu. cantik, cantik sangat. yang hebatnya, semua janji2 Dia boleh pakai. bukan mcm manusia yg hnya pndai tabur janji, tp tunaikannya belum tentu lagi. 

Kawan2 ! sy tk ckp bnda2 ni sebab nk poyo, nk menunjuk ke apa, cuma nk sedarkan kita semua, and to remind myself jugak, cinta manusia hnya sementara. I'm not asking you to isolate yourself from the world, avoiding yourself from falling to the opposite gender. NO ! Cinta itu fitrah. MEMANG TAKKAN BOLEH ELAK. tapi apakata kita mantapkan cinta kita pada Dia dulu ? so that cinta kita pada Dia tu membawa kepada cinta kepada manusia ? tk ke cantik kalau mcm tuuu (: 

Jom cintakan Allah sebanyak-banyak nya, ok ? :) 

wallahua'lam. 

My Dear Future Husband (:

My Dear Future Husband :) ,  

I can't promise you that I'll cook the best meal you have ever tasted,

But I promise to make sure that I'll be preparing all your meals and be there with you when you eat.

I can't promise you that our home will be filled with fancy and expensive stuffs,

But I promise that I'll fill it with love and positive vibes.

I can't promise you that I'll be pretty all the time,

But I promise to be pretty only for you. 

I can't promise you that I'll be spending all my time with you,

But I promise to spend all my time thinking of Him, and when I think of Him, I'll think of the love He sends to me. 

I can't promise you that I will not talk to the other guys,

But I promise that only you can look into my eyes and touch my heart.

I can't promise you to be the best wife in the world,

But I promise to try to be His best servant, and pray that He'll grant my wish to be your wife in the life hereafter.

My Dear Future Husband :) ,

I want to be your soft-hearted Aisyah, your loyal Khadijah, your strong Asma', and your humble Fatimah.

And I will love you as long as you love Him :) 

Choices :)

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim. 

Pernah dengar tak orang cakap "You are what you are today because of the choices that you made yesterday" ? Maybe I am just 19 but truthfully, I think I had seen and experienced enough in my life, and I can say that, to make a choice is not an easy deal :)

Yang kelakarnya, walaupun benda ni susah, kita kena buat jugak. Start dari bangun pagi2, pilih nak tidur balik ke nak pergi kelas ;) Then yang perempuan pulak, bila nak pergi kelas kena pilih baju warna apa nak pakai hari ni. Sandals ke heels ? Tudung lilit ke tak ? Kesimpulannya, memang tak boleh lari laa daripada buat keputusan ni. Sigh sigh sigh.

Tapi yang ajaib nya, you can feel the difference when you make choices because of Him and only Him. For instance, "Nak pergi konsert ke, ceramah ?" Memang kalau ikut majoriti akan cakap nk pergi ceramah la kan, konon2 nya ceramah tu membawa lebih banyak kebaikan. Tapi tanya balik diri kita, kenapa nak pergi ceramah ? sebab ceramah tu baik ? sebab Imam Muda Asyraf yang bagi ceramah ? ke sebab ikut kawan ? ;) masing2 tahu jawapan sendiri, right ? :) 

CUBA, CUBA pada suatu ketika, kita ambil satu keputusan tu, SEMATA-MATA kerana Allah S.W.T. Contoh, bila bangun pagi and malas pergi kelas, kita kuatkan jugak hati kerana Allah S.W.T. :) From my experience my friends, you'll be able to see the domino effects in the near future. Bila niat sudah ikhlas dan betul, kita  akan belajar dengan senang. Bila dalam kelas dah faham, revision jadi mudah. Bila revision mudah, result pun gempak ! :D InsyaAllah !! :) 

Kesimpulannya, letaklah Allah S.W.T. sebagai satu2 nya niat dalam setiap apa pun pilihan yang kita buat. From the tiniest little things like what to wear to major decisions in your life. You'll see that when you choose ONLY BECAUSE OF HIM, He'll ease your life :) In the future, you'll be able to look back and smile on how beautiful things have been when you put Allah as the top priority. Yes, sometimes we'll need to sacrifice. No worries. It'll worth all the pain and tears :)  

I made a difficult choice yesterday and I can proudly say that I am where I am now because of Him :) only Him. 

wallahua'lam. 

A letter to a friend.

Dear friend, 

It has been awhile now. And I decided to write you a letter. Yes, it has been awhile, but I can never forget you. Because you used to be the greatest friend I had ever have. Used to be. 

Dear friend, 

It was not an easy decision. In fact, it was a really tough time for me. Trust me, it was difficult. But thanks to you, you made it easier. Leaving you left me questions I can never answer. Was it the right move? Was it my fault? Or was it all wrong? Only He knows. 

Dear friend,

I know you will never come across this letter, that is why I write it here. Now I am going to tell you the truth. Nothing but just plain truth.

Dear friend,

A day had never passed by without me thinking what would it be if we were still friends. We will laugh together, have fun together, and go places together. We had fun, yes we did. But what would He think of us? Where will all the fun bring us to? Definitely not to Him. That defeats our purpose of living in this temporary world. We are NOT HERE JUST TO HAVE FUN. We are here with special missions. To become His servants and lead the ummah. Fun will bring us nowhere but to the burning hot hell. I explained that to you and I thought you understood. I was wrong. 

Dear friend,

I am disappointed. With myself. I changed you. But you changed because of me. Now that I am no longer a part of your life, all the changes are gone. I failed to guide you, friend. I failed miserably. And I blame no one but myself. If only I have a little bit more time. 

Dear friend,

You're too far now. I can no longer reach you. But I never stop hoping. I always pray, that someday, you'll come back to Him. I believe in you, and I believe that He will grant my doa. If not today, He will, in future. 

Dear friend, 

There is more to life than just having fun. Yes, maybe you can run from your responsibility now. But you can't run from His questions in the life hereafter. I hope, I really really hope that one day you will understand this jihad that I am in. And I hope you will understand that this jihad does not only include me, it also includes you, for you are a Muslim. 

Dear friend, 

I loved you before, and I still love you now. I love you friend because of Him. I am happy to know that you're happy with your life now. But I hope that one day you'll come back to Him. You'll come back to Him. 

Ameen. 

Perlukah cerita masalah kepada orang lain? hmm.

Assalamualaikum (: 

Dua tiga hari ni, rasa macam banyak pulak masalah yg datang tiba2. ada jugak yg bukan masalah pun, tp sebab banyak sgt fikir, rasa macam benda tu menyusahkan -__- dah tu, bila ada masalah, cerita dekat orang. maybe some people say that it'll ease the burden. but if we realise, we're actually reminding ourselves of that particular problem. macam mana masalah tu nak pergi kalau kita cerita kt org and cerita lagi dan lagi dan lagi..... hah ! tgk2 kita akan lagi ingat. sampai termimpi-mimpi -__-"

hmm. patut la masalah tk hilang kn ? the best way to make it gone is, TO TELL HIM (:  rasa tenang bila cerita kt Dia. dan rasa lebih selamat bila bergantung harap kt Dia :') and the best part is, He'll try to help us in His own unique, unexpected ways. sometimes kita tk appreciate, or maybe kita tk sedar. problem will only be gone when He allows it. when enough lessons are obtained by it :) after all, tk kan la saja2 je Dia nk bagi masalah kn ? tu ujian drp Dia :D 

so bila dpt masalah, sekarang kita SENYUM SAHAJA :) sebab itu tandanya Dia sayang kita. dan Dia nk uji sayang kita pada Dia ;) 

yang pelik nya, kenapa kita nk bercerita kt org lain, kalau Allah sendiri dah cakap:

"(yaitu) orang-orang yang beriman dan hati mereka menjadi tenteram dengan mengingati Allah. Ingatlah, hanya dengan mengingati Allah hati menjadi tenteram".

Ar-Ra'd:28 

hah ! kan manual dah bagi jawapan. so akan tenangkah kita bila bercerita kt orang lain ? tk jugak :) sebab Allah dah ckp mcm tu, and He knows what we don't ;) and the best way to make your problem gone ? DOA. tell Him what you feel (tho actually He knows ever single thing) :))

post ini semata-mata menegur diri sendiri (:

wallahua'lam. 

ya Allah, I need you so badly :(

Assalamualaikum.

Too many things in life had thought me that He does not always follow our ways. Sometimes, He just wants us to learn from our mistakes, from the heartaches. 

But He will never ever do anything for no reason. There will always be something behind it. Or maybe sometimes, He just wants us to find Him.

ya Allah, your test is so great I don't think I can bear it. but no one knows me better than You do.

ya Allah, I know you're listening everything my heart says. Ease my pain ya Allah. Show me the right way. 

I have You, and only You.